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Relationships + Revenue w/ The Oper8tor

Episode 7: What Being In Relationship Means

0:00:02 - Briar

Hello, welcome everyone. I am Briar Harvey. This is the Neurodiversity Media Network and today we are here for the final episode in our Relationships and Revenue season one. We're going to be back this fall We'll talk about that in a few minutes But Staci and I just wanted to wrap things up, put a tidy little bow on it. We have covered a lot of ground in the last four and a half months as we have rolled this series out, and I really wanted to make sure that y'all understood. So, Staci, key points here. You're still muted.

0:01:07 - Staci

Key points With this topic. You know these have been part of my pillars, of my brands, and I'm going to shift a little bit now, and part of it has to do with the conversations we've been having and the feedback that I've gotten over the topics. We've been talking about revenue and we've been talking about relationships. Relationships are going to happen day in and day out. It's a matter of how you use them, or if you abuse them. That's going to make the difference in your personal life, in your career, in opportunities that you may be unawares of all the time. And then revenue.

While we talk about revenue, you and I have done a lot of talking about the fact that revenue is not where it stops, because you actually need to have profit. We've talked about the things that have held us up. We've talked about time management and how that looks different for everyone, neurodivergent or not, which I believe the numbers are higher, based on people I know of being neurodivergent or having something that sets you apart. If it's not something that they diagnose or consider to be long term, it can be an acute scenario where you still have to figure out how do I modify what I've been doing to fit where I am right now because if I don't, it's going to affect my revenue, whether that's on a full-time job or whether that's as a solo, pre-nor, small or mid-sized business owner.

Those things happen all the time, and Breyer talks a lot about how we respond to what we consider to be crisis, and we were just talking before about kind of what's your crisis management plan? If this happens and you're already in it, are you in the position to now verbalize and express to somebody what help you need or how they can go about helping you In time management? we've talked about planners and whether a paper planner, a digital planner in your phone, what works for you and use that. Sometimes it's going to take you trial and error of purchasing 12 different planners and saying I like a little of this, a little of that. You may have to use more than one 12 and one year.

0:04:01 - Briar

y'all 12 and one year is terrible.

0:04:06 - Staci

Exactly. You'll have to figure out how do you like to manage your time. Is it hourly, is it weekly? Do you want separate budgeting calendar from your finance tracker of your business versus your personal? and then there's your spiritual side of that as well. So a number of things. If you're saying, well, i didn't hear about that, you've got to go back and just listen. Get to go back to the beginning and talk about you know to hear about that. We've talked about in business, making sure that you understand what financial responsibilities you have, and that has to do with the revenue component. And if you don't have them and don't know them, then you need to create a relationship with the experts that actually do, because more of the time that you actually spend attempting to do something that's not in your genius lane or not of ease to you, you are actually stressing out the rest of your body. You are using parts of your brain that may need exercise, true, but when it comes to having that time where you're attempting to be productive as a neurodivergent, this is not the time for new things and new learning curves. So take the time to master what you do so that you can pay the people that are the experts in the other areas. And then that's part of relationships too, because we are creating an ecosystem here. Briar has that with all of the different shows that she has. She didn't start out by putting a Facebook ad or a Google ad out. Briar said where are my friends that are experts And I'm going to approach them? Relationships were key to starting and fulfilling this network, and where it's going now is now in the next circle level. Now it's in the places and spaces where she is her letting people know what she does, and now people are asking to be part of the process. That's how the relationships and revenue work. Does it take time? Yes, do you have to nurture? Yes, do you have to be intentional? Absolutely, but it can happen, and so now we're looking at that.

Clarity In the beginning of this that's what Briar did. Was she got clear about what do I want to do? What do I enjoy doing? What could I do six days out of the week without a hiccup? that when I wake up in the morning, i'm driven to actually do this and excited to do it? And that was talk with people. That's, you know, share expertise, that share knowledge that people would not have gotten if it wasn't for the conversations that she was having And she decided that's what she was going to do. Go to the inner circle, ask them about it. How do you feel about this? What do you think? And of course, we were all like, yeah, i want to be on it, i want to do it, i want to do it, i'll support you. And now it's just, it's just going and going.

So what is that thing that you could do six days out of the week? And when you got up in the morning and we hear about the jobs all the time and I don't wanna go to work anymore, i saw a post today with somebody saying I need help from entrepreneurs that have been in it for a while, because I'm just tired of crying on my way to work every day And my heart just hurt for her because I remember. But how do you get to the place where Briar is, where she gets up and does two and three, shows a day on rotation, of bi-weekly rotation, and she's happy to do it and excited to do it and wants to do more of it? What's that thing for you? And then talk to a few key people. This is not telling everybody. Don't shout it from the rooftops because you want the buffer, you want the okay, this seems to make sense or the support of. I support you to do it, regardless of what decision you make about it, and those people. That's part of this neurodivergent network is having those people.

So now I have other people within her network that I can ask about different things. And I already know that I have a past because I'm friends with Briar, because I'm a co-host with Briar, i already have an in. Where is your in? Who are your ins? Who knows what you love to do and is willing to support you? Who knows what you want to do and is willing to offer their talent, their skillset, their brain power.

And it may be a 15 minute conversation, it may just be a question in a chat, but build that support system, that network, first so that when you fall there's somebody there to catch you. And that's what Briar did. Now she's clear, now there's a network, now it's going to expand. The question is do you want to be part of it? And if you're not clear, you need to go to the network. Choose the topics where you need the assistance, where you think you might have fallen short, subscribe so that you can get the information If it's in private, if you share it on the big screen, do what you have to do, but make sure that you do something. We're not going to end out Q2 with no movement because, if nothing else, each one of these shows, through the relationships that they have, are driving you towards revenue, driving you towards profitability, driving you towards relaxation and legacy.

0:10:23 - Briar

So I'll pass it. I just it's so fascinating to me because we started this show as I was starting the network And I suspect now as I go back through and build the masterclass of this series in particular, which is available to paid subscribers at the Nerd diversity media network. That's $25 a month y'all to get the masterclasses, because in addition to all of our time together, we'll build out additional resources, potentially any workbook type items and things that you might need, and my business has been the example that we have used this whole way through. It's really striking to me how far we've come just since January, and that truly is remarkable all on its face.

0:11:22 - Staci

It is and it is, but it's so much about you getting clear. So that's my focus for the next six to nine months is working with people to just get clear about what you really want. And then, what are your talents and skills that are already out there? What are people asking you to do? What can you do that if you woke up and you don't feel great or, as they say, you got up on the wrong side of the bed that you still will say, yeah, but I've got this to do today, so I gotta keep moving, i gotta keep going. That thing that's gonna drag you because we know, as neurodivergence, there are plenty of times when we get pulled back, there are things that go wrong and aren't in alignment all of the time. So this consistency that you've created for yourself has become guardrails that other things work around, and it created boundaries. It created drive, purpose and not just one time over because of the number of episodes, the number of shows that you have going at one time. So the question is you know, Almost 30.

Oh my gosh Now that's active and in development. But yeah, almost 30 now.

0:12:51 - Briar

Yeah, yeah.

0:12:56 - Staci

But you were willing to share the idea. You were willing to tweak and mold as you went along. And I know that. first, as women, a lot of times we are so harsh on ourselves about not wanting to put something out there before it's all right, not wanting to ask people who we feel are on the same level to work with us to create something great. But if you and I look at your friends and your relationships, they are all heart centered.

first, we all believe in doing our best to believe in doing our part in community and giving. I'd say 50 to 60% of us have given more than we've gotten paid for And we vow that this year we weren't going to continue to let that happen. And we've all taken each other with us because for every step that you take forward, the rest of the line moves as long as we stay connected. So who, if you're out there listening now or on replay, who are you connecting to And do you see their movement already? Are you willing to move with them or are you going to be dead weight? Because there are a number of us. last year was, even if we're not talking about revenue lives alone tore up, passings of important people in our lives tore us up. All of these were knockdowns that we had to get up from in Q4. We were tired as hell.

0:15:21 - Briar

I mean, listen, this is not where I thought I would be this time last year And I am. It was on the. It was on the horizon, Like it was the long term plan. This was the thing that I was building up towards instead of actually doing the work to build, And I really think that there is now, especially now. So yesterday, Jupiter entered Taurus. This is a big transit. This is a big time. Jupiter will be in Taurus for the next year or so And we get to grow things abundantly. That's what this looks like. So, more than any other time, truly, now is the time to figure out what it is you want to put out into the world and build, what you want to grow and how you want to do it, And it'll get you there.

0:16:32 - Staci

Yes, it is the year of the rising Phoenix. We were left in ashes last year And many people decided that they weren't going it alone this year In running businesses, in having teams. This is a time where more people decided you know what. I need a VA, i need help, i need somebody to be checks and balances. I realized that I had a pretty good posting time over on Instagram, but when I got up I posted overnight, which worked well for me. My audience was used to it because I used to have a lot of Cali or Pacific folks, so me posting at that time on Eastern or Central was no big deal. So what I started realizing.

I wake up in the morning I'm like look at the typos. You know like they still hearted and kept going or commented. But look at the typos. And why is this? Because I'm doing this at a time where I shouldn't be. Why am I answering people's responses at 11.45 at night? And then I'm talking about people not keeping my boundaries. Why am I not scheduling emails? yet I'm still sending emails, newsletters, at 10.30 at night. And then, when I get up in the morning, i'm like Oh, nobody's ready yet because who was up? Who was up?

So all of the, the double work, the boundaries not being kept, the anxiety over not performing well was all done by me. So figuring out those things, having that that time not being easily accessible or accessible on demand, those were things I had to learn in that Q4. If I was going to live and survive a business because I was definitely at a point like I can sit all this down and just be an affiliate And I just didn't know where I was going to go back to work because that wasn't even working. Applying for jobs was not even working over qualified or not enough money for me to even wake up in the morning. And when I start doing the numbers from tracking and I say, well, if they're going to pay $800 a week, then how many $100 things is that for me to sell?

So start creating the $100 thing Stacey and putting the energy behind that and not the madness that I had in Chicago of being on public transportation with four year olds eating flaming hots and drinking high seas at 630 in the morning. That already had me like what, while I took an hour and 42 minutes to commute to and home and sometimes home was at 11 o'clock at night on a shift where I look up at the L digital board and it says it's negative 27 degrees, like that's not what I want. But how do I keep myself out of that? I have to change some things. There are some things I had to let go of. Physical things. I had to let go of some mental crap I had to let go of and promise myself not to go back and get it, because I'm infamous for that. If it's in a bag, well I still want the bag.

0:20:31 - Briar

I got to go back and then you look and make sure it's Like, and then it's in a storage closet full of other doom bags. Why are we like this Staci?

0:20:43 - Staci

The same with the altar going to church and I said, okay, i'm going to leave it at the altar. Here you go, god. This is what's going on this issue right now. You can have it before I leave church. I'm like, ah, that might be a little too heavy for him. Let me get the wallet out of there, or the travel purse or the something else out of there, because I might be able to work with that and fix that myself. And I'm like, when you think about it, no, i'm not the best person to do it. Who's got more experience? Who has more resources?

0:21:18 - Briar

You know, truly, the part of understanding ourself that is so complicated is that we're too close to the situation.

0:21:31 - Staci

Absolutely.

0:21:33 - Briar

And it's really really hard, but you really really have to let your village support you in this arena and tell you what it is you're supposed to be doing, and that requires a level of surrender that is incredibly difficult. But I promise you, if you take this leap out and allow your community to support you and the work that you choose to do, you will grow from it every time.

0:22:11 - Staci

Yeah, yeah, and Jasmine said you know that it's hard to look at the full picture from inside the frame, and that's definitely my case. And then when I go out, then I'm still, i'm like the back and forth, and then on top of it I'm a Gemini, you know. So then there's times where I go OK, and I'm so emotional about it And you know, i'm feeling it. They say feel all the things, allow yourself to, you know, move through and do all of that. And the other side of Gemini is like hey, chick, come on, we got things to do, we got money to make, we got people that are dependent on you, we got communities to shake up and disrupt. You don't have time to sit in it. So practicing and knowing when to flux in and when to flux out, but sometimes too, that takes And these relationships for people that know you, for you to allow yourself to get feedback from them, you know, and to ask for it, but when and when you say that you're willing to accept it, to really be willing to accept it, because they will tell it to you at times where you're not particularly asking at that moment, but you've given them a blanket time to speak freely. And those are the times that make the most difference, because you were in a blind spot, you had no idea, you didn't see it. It was happening over and over and over again, and it took for somebody else to say well, you know, have you ever thought about why are you in that again? Or, for some people, why do the people that you date, you know? you know I can't find a? well, what might you possibly need to change in order to attract something different and to repel that which you don't want? And that's in personal relationships as well as in business, and we all have heard the. What you focus on grows, and that's so true. And sometimes, like I've found because I've been called on this that I have to write out the thing that's not right or that I don't like, and I have to physically discard it so that I have that action that I can remember. No, i'm not supposed to be on that. And then I have to write that which is the inverse opposite, which is what I want, and the steps that it takes to get that. You talk about manifestation and I believe in manifestation, and it takes work. It still involves having a clear goal, clear goal of what you want, putting as many details as possible in it.

When we say we're looking for clients, well, i want somebody that's going to pay, that can afford to pay. But you forgot to say you didn't want somebody that was going to micromanage you. You didn't want somebody that was going to go outside of the boundaries. You didn't want somebody that had a history of charge backs. You know what I'm saying. I want someone that and build the full thing out. What actions, boundaries, guidelines can you put into place to help those things happen? Help yourself, help the universe, help you. And that starts with getting clear. I mean, you are the best example right now. Get clear. Nope, that doesn't look right. Nope, that's got pink rose glasses on it. That's not what I said. When I said purple, i meant purple. When I said cats, i meant cats.

0:26:14 - Briar

Damn it. And I kept them, even through a rebrand, by the way. Like you get to decide what's important to you, you get to decide what you're keeping And then you get to have somebody else say okay, now here are the blind spots. Have you thought about those?

0:26:39 - Staci

Yeah, and they're part of your network. You know that my power partners and I need them really circling back around to really strengthen and connect with them and get commitments out of people, because then you have expectations out of people. Well, did you share it? Did you tell anybody about it, did you? you know? but you have people in your network now where you can say, oh yeah, i got an expert on that. I know enough to know this person is an expert and I'm going to refer them and then, if you need something else, come back to my network. They're all gonna be here in a minute. Like everything you can think of is about to be here on this network in a minute.

So, just grateful to be a part of it, to be part of the visionary. You know the okay brainstorm. I'm looking to do this, you know, i love it. I love it when you drop in the chat and you're like, hey, got a minute. I'm like, yes, it's what I live for, you know. And then to see it become and Now growing and blossoming with blossoming with things that, like you said that, yeah, i didn't really figure this to be a part of it, but This feels good. So I'm gonna move forward with this and I'm gonna keep doing the things that I'm already doing that feel right, and so I'm proud of you. I'm proud of being part of the personal circle, part of the the woo circle, part of the tech circle and the audit circle, and then part of the brainstorming that allows me to think bigger. Because if you're not around people that can have that, have big goals and dreams and can think outside of the box and make you go I never thought about doing that Then you need to step your foot into some other circles. Every once in a while at least See how it feels.

Go with somebody, partner up You heard bryer talk about we talked about networking and components of that and sometimes it's an accountability partner. Sometimes it's somebody else just to drive for me. They say I'm coming to pick you up and we're going to and I still want to cancel, but I go. How much do I have to really do other than get dressed and leave? You know the rest of work itself out Those people in your life. Do you have relationships like that? And if you don't, you need to start seeking them out, whether they're online or offline, whether they're part of intentional Organizations set up. If you know you have a specific need, seek out, ask Google, ask chat GPT. Ask Siri, ask elect. I can't say the rest of the work because she'll start talking, but ask. There are too many free resources out here for us to be clueless at this point. And if you don't know, then start here, ask in the chat, tell us that you need Some communication, you need a coffee chat you need to be connected to, and we'll get you connected. That's what we do.

0:29:59 - Briar

So in August We're gonna be back With season two where we're gonna do live audits. There are so many things That we can diagnose about your business and your life and your relationships Based on what saying don't say on the internet. Most of you are probably not aware How many breadcrumbs who are leaving out there for us to find, for you, for states and others. There's a lot of joy in this, i have to admit.

0:30:41 - Staci

I do?

0:30:42 - Briar

I like the audit process. I like to see what's the holes are and what's not working, because That's something that can be fixed, that's something that can be improved upon and if you know it, then That's the first as they say on GI Joe knowing it and That's what we're gonna do for you. So we're gonna have a Form for you to fill out interest in being audited live, because obviously it'll be live. We're going through all of your stuff. We'll be looking at what we see, what we don't see, and We're gonna help you figure out the best ways to close those gaps. Now I still do audits for For $2,000 for me to throw a questionnaire at you and then give you a checklist.

Stacey also offers audits. For how much? Stacey 1499, 1499, which likely has a whole more resources than mine does, because Stacey actually, you know, goes the extra mile on this stuff. I'm like here I have a questionnaire, you'll you'll figure it out. Truly, the assessment is part of the process and We'll probably ask you a few questions, but mostly we're gonna see what we see and what we don't see. So if this is something that interests you, please let us know in the comments. We'll make sure that you get a link to the application as soon as it is available, and We're really looking forward to this. The joy of building your relationships and your revenue comes from being able to execute on your network, and That's what we're gonna tell you is what you're missing and how you can grow.

0:33:00 - Staci

Absolutely, and you know we were talking about this and we had another direction We were going. But as we were having discussions, the thing is is that many people attempt to purchase a program or become part of an Academy or hire a coach Because they believe they have X as a problem, they think that it's the copywriting, or they think that it's That they don't have a Facebook group, so they don't have anybody to sell to you. But really, in doing the intake and doing an audit, it's about uncovering as far back as possible What the root issues are. So we'll be talking about the thought process, because we know how important mindset is to your movement forward or not. We'll be talking about time management again, because You know, in a neural world that's always a big deal and in a non neural world It's a big deal. So what does that look like? and is that hindering your ability to move your business forward or your personal life forward? because we know that this is a 360 situation and where your personal life affects your business and your business will affect your personal life, and 80% and higher of the divorces are caused by issues with finance. And if you are a solo Prenor or a small business owner. That's where those issues are coming from. So let's talk about that Thought process, time management.

What are the tools that you're using? now? I've talked to some people and they say well, i've got this for email and I've got this for CRM And I have this for a platform. My website is over here. I do landing pages over here, i have and I'm whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

0:34:55 - Briar

As our good friend Veronica Yans would say, perhaps you need to audit your emotional support tech stack.

0:35:03 - Staci

I love it. I love it And that's actually the truth. And so what that does is that many times we're able to find where you can consolidate, get in the right tool so that you can actually and another one of the elements of it is start creating and generating a team. But for many of us we say, well, i don't have the money to do that. That's because the money's going into the emotional tech support. That's where it's going. So would you prefer to have that, or would you like to have a human that you can actually give some directives to, and so that team building component, or somebody that you're utilizing to do your taxes and keep track of your books and things, so that you're not off with that, that says, okay, it's tax time, we need to pay. And when you realize you don't have the funds set aside, like how do we fix that now and not go quarters and quarters and quarters being off track? And then the tactics And I really debated about.

You know we talk about techniques, but sometimes this is tactics, because when you are already on the negative side of something, you need to be more aggressive about how you fix it. Oh, i need to hire somebody to do social media management, but you have no idea what your pillars are. You have no idea what you want them to post about, you don't know when you're launching your next thing, and that your social media needs to be in alignment with that next launch, which means that all of the breadcrumbs of the conversations you're having need to lead towards that, and so, if you haven't been doing it before, this becomes a tactic. That then because now we need to be aggressive that then falls back into being a technique.

0:36:53 - Briar

Right, And there's there's so much room here. Strategy is long term. Technique is the way that you apply your strategy, but your tactics are the things that move the needle, and not every tactic is the right tactic And not every tactic will be the right tactic for you.

0:37:22 - Staci

Right.

0:37:23 - Briar

But you have to at least explore the things that will actually move the needle in your business or in your life.

0:37:32 - Staci

And you don't know what you don't know sometimes, right, and this is what we're definitely finding out, even with the AI, and people are saying, oh my God, chat, gpt, chat GPT is not the only AI tool. And then out of chat GPT, that's really open AI And you know so all of the things. So it's a being around people that can give you some insight, and it's not that they have to school you on it, but just to give you enough curiosity to say is this something I want to explore? Is this something I want to hire somebody that knows about to be part of my team to implement it, or is this something that I find to be non-athletical at the moment? or it's not a priority at the moment, because some of that, too, is what we do in the audience is prioritization.

You want to launch something June 1st, yet you're talking about this thing that you're working on or that somebody is doing in November. The priority is the June 1st thing or all these things in place, and if not, then let's do that. But sometimes we're passionate about it And I know I have fallen prey, because I can get passionate about this today And in three days from now there's another vision, or a friend has a vision and I'm passionate about that, and all this is a bunch of open tabs and loose ends and lost revenue.

0:38:59 - Briar

She says, after she had to close a bunch tabs this morning in order to actually have the bandwidth to be here on this show. Like we're all guilty of this Staci and I are not trying to judge this. It's that we have been there and we've brought back some stuff and we would like to help show you the way that there is a better way. So between now and August, if you need an audit, i deeply encourage you to go talk to Staci. and what is the website? Where can they find this?

0:39:44 - Staci

They're gonna and I'm gonna put this in here. Well, yeah, it's a coffee chat And I'm just. I try to keep things easy now for my own self as an herb divergent And for those that I serve as a neurodivergent. You can always come back to this for me, theoperatorcom forward slash coffee chat. If you've seen an offer, if you've heard about something and you're like I don't remember what it was specifically or I don't remember the website, jot this one down and keep this, because you can get on here and we can have that conversation about that thing and I can either direct you to the right person or we can move forward with a service or something.

But this is huge because we want the year before that we actually worked on something to help people finish fast for the year, and this we're starting a little bit earlier. Why? Because both Breyer and I want time off at the end of the year. And if we want time off no, seriously then somebody else wants time off. And if you're not, if you are stuck in US Western culture ways, you'll find out that there are different boundaries and guidelines in UK, in Canada, but if you're not talking to them and you're surrounding yourself only with this Western mentality. I'm just telling you you're missing out on freeing yourself. You have to see something different in order to seize it. So be exposed to the network and the things that are available.

Subscribe to the network. There are still other shows that are going on now live. They're staggered. So pay attention to those shows that are going on and then subscribe so you can go in. This is the time during the summer where you may have downtime, personal time, over your own coffee, over your own cognac, whatever it is, maybe while you're crying, and you just need a companion in the room with you that you feel when you listen to their voice, that they just understand where you are right now, even if the circumstances were different. This network is designed for the neurodivergent and for those that deal with us, and that means everyone. So make sure that you're sharing. If it's this show that you subscribe on YouTube, we're both listed over there. Look for both of us over there. Subscribe to this one, subscribe to the network in general and get what you need, and if we don't already have it, ask for it, brian and I invite coming up with solutions.

So up to you to close it out, brian Harvey, it has been an honor on my behalf to be part of this show of revenue and relationships that is very dear to me, the pillars of all my brands and things that you and I have been discussing offline in several masterminds, in several groups that we've been together in over the last three years, and individually in chat. Tell the dragons that I said hello and thank you, as always. And thank you for the mid journey, my first mid journey cats and cat woman as well, that have taken me on a separate path. So, for the love of business and for the love of sisterhood, thank you, brian Harvey.

0:43:27 - Briar

Aw, thank you Truly. this series has been an absolute delight. I'm so glad that we got to spend this time together and I'm so glad that we both got to grow through this process, because that's really used my business and we've used your business and we have operated through this time space together on these things and grown.

So I deeply encourage people to wait and check out the masterclass. This one's gonna be epic Again. If you need to subscribe, that is neurodiversitymedianetworkcom We would love to have you aboard. Thank you all so much for being here and we will see you again in August for your personalized relationships and revenue audits. It's gonna be so much fun y'all.

0:44:27 - Staci

Woo, yes, it is. It is Bye now Bye.

Transcribed by https://podium.page

Neurodiversity Media Network
Neurodiversity Media Network
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Briar Harvey