0:00:03 - Briar
There we are. Hello everyone, welcome. I am Briar Harvey. This is the Neurodiversity Media Network and I am here today with Samantha Fischer for our premiere episode of We Are Nature 2.
Now, when we were talking about what the series was going to be, it kind of meandered around and made some stops off into some places and she's laughing as though this is a deficit in some way.
I have recently had several things happen in my life where I've been made very aware of how important it is that we get to tell our stories, how important it is that we get to be heard when we tell our stories, and I think that storytelling is an art and a science and it is something that lives and breathes.
And the more that we understand the nature of story and how it plays into our lives, the easier it is for us to tell our stories. But and I think this is more important incorporate our stories into our lives. And every time we talk, sam tells me a story And I learned something. It's a very organic process And I don't think she's quite aware of how magical that process is. So what we're going to be doing in this episode in this series is kind of unpacking the ways in which our stories connect us to our greater natures, how we are all connected, how we are all part and parcel of the same thing. And with that, i would love for you to tell us, samantha, who you are and where you came from.
0:02:35 - Samantha
All right, Glad I have time because the elevator speaks to something I'm never really good at Like. All right, give us who you are. In 30 seconds I'm going.
I've got a whole hour for you, i know, i know I'm glad And that it touches on the place of like that whole muchness, wound, that it feels like everybody walking around a female. But I've learned it's not just female body, people too. Like that whole getting to be your full, much self. I've turned, like turning 53, and God is slowly becoming like less than two months now, a little over two months now, but like that birth I'm like the salt puts me solidly in my 50s And it's like, oh no, i'm in my 50s And it's still something. It starts to fall away. Like taking up space is something I finally feel I get to do, but it didn't always come easy getting to a tell my story or flesh out and be a part of it.
I grew up in East Texas, a small town called Tyler, and was born into a fundamentalist family. For those of you if you all saw, if anybody has seen shiny, happy people, we didn't. I didn't have to wear the the homage kind of clothes like, because my mother's a tourist and a close, a close Hound, but I was basically raised by the barely hillbillies And we're also yeah, if you could put those two together and then throw in my father, who's like a male Brooks kind of character to give you a summation of what it was like to be a small, very but a small child in a community of like you know it was. it was a banking kind of town But and big Amish family, no boundaries, and then I was a questioner and they were all like I was Jesus And so fortunately, i found my love of books early and my love of stories and my love of information And I was also raised by tied that in with. I was the one got dragged around by the grandmother and the storytelling that great uncles and would sit around and talk about whittling the whittling on the back porch or the sitting around and cracking green beans from, you know, in the kitchen with my caregiver who, grandmother, had been a slave.
I mean, like I know I'm popcorn this but like there are so many experiences in my childhood that makes some of the things we're talking about today very real. Like I understand why people have white supremacy, things flowing through them, believe well this and why people that have this is not where I thought this was going to go Here it is, but I grew up with a lot of connections to issues that feel like they're literally in my body as memories And they're vivid And so I could feel the otherness that wasn't supposed to be there And I felt it was something that I could question. And I think today I mean because I still got to go, like outside, because that was your baby, sir, when you were, when I was a kid was outside, you know, bye, we'll see you at dark. And I think about today with our level of like that's not just a jen X joke or a meme. And I think about today when, like people are now afraid, like we had all those child murderers, and people are not then became afraid to leave their children outside of the real level, like physical fear, like that's something that we feel. Like if someone shoot you the bird or something, you don't have to use words to communicate that story. Your body feels an anger that is being generated by that body And it feels like from the time, like I feel like I got to be raised by the last level of American, like innocence, like I remember Nixon flying away and crying, and so it feels like there was a time in my body when I remembered something that was what people were, people remember and harken back to.
That really was just nostalgia And I don't know where this is going, but I think it's great. I remember what people think they still want, but they don't remember the stuff that was also bad with that Right, like when people are like Oh yeah, make America great again. I'm like it really wasn't. But you're remembering a time we weren't all tethered to phones and we weren't all tethered to time and we weren't all tethered to all this stuff. Now that's making us miserable. You're just remembering when we all had time to sit around.
0:07:46 - Briar
We still because and that's because story allows us to polish over the bad bits, right.
0:07:58 - Samantha
We get to like whoever's narrative wins, wins. It's kind of like why the whole, like the lost cause idea of the Civil War I was raised with one whole growing with a story about, a story about how you know the war of Northern aggression. So you know, the war wasn't about slavery. The war was absolutely about slavery. But there are generations of people that don't believe that And so it's learning to tell like personal stories and one's own personal narrative And to learn how to, or one's family narrative, like I was telling you before we got on here about I didn't see your post earlier because I was trying to tell my father how to do a talk to text for my mother. She's got dementia now but she still remembers our like old family stories or what our neighbors believed and what our neighbors know in our town. It's like, yes, my hometown's still in the 50s, but there are some beautiful stories there And so and why, it still is Like if we don't know why we can't move forward with new things, if we don't like reconcile what's going on and know the because I was one of those kids and everything, well, why, well, why, and because I said so was never a good enough answer. It's like well, and so I raised kids and I gave them answers, and I think part of what's in our thing right now is we don't. Nothing is personal, nothing is well-nnuanced, and I think stories allow us to find the nuance between and the connection where we hear our story and someone else's story. I think this is what I love about you know.
The neuro spicy thing is, when someone tells me a story, i'll like oh, they're on the other time that blah, blah, blah, and they're like stop and starting your story. In there I was like I'm not, i have to explain this. I was like I'm not trying to insert myself, i'm making sure I understand. I'm doing this for clarity And cause. That was the way I was taught to empathize as a young person. Thanks, apa. But you know now I know that that's probably not the best way, but also it's like oh, i'm sharing a story, like a bird sharing a here, let's show anything.
Stories were currency where I came from And I think they are always like that's from the time we, like could share, from the time we had words. That's how we shared data to the next generation. We would sit around the fire, make up stories about whatever was important to the current well, the elders of one generation to the next. And I think about now how our stories were taught, like back when we had three channels, our culture was taught through television. Our Saturday mornings we learned about all the symphonies and things like that through Bugs Bunny, or so you had a working cultural repertoire. That, because there's not this like now, there's so much choice out there, the idea that everybody on Monday nights is gonna be watching happy days, right.
0:11:07 - Briar
Is in happy right now.
0:11:09 - Samantha
We've lost that collective story. We lost the collective story, which is great because there's all this diversity of story that we can rub up against and learn from. Like the thing. oh, we should all go back to that. Like no more. choice is always cool Because it gives everybody a place at the table And everybody gets what suits them as a meal. It's like a food court instead of a, so just one truck out there.
0:11:35 - Briar
Ooh, I like that.
0:11:38 - Samantha
However, comma trying to figure out. I think that's where we are collectively, like we in our country, like, oh, i've got this version of history And I've got this version of it. I was like there's probably a little truth in everybody's version. Right, i'm gonna move it all forward as a, because everybody's family's got a version of how I came when Paul Paul did this. Yeah, just in my, in my high school alone, i heard those stories. Or even down here in San Antonio, It's the very, very different Stories of how to get something through a county government.
Yeah, and then how do we all do it? Well, and listening to people's stories around, oh Well, this bill will hurt my child, or this bill, like, like the whole thing. I was reading this right before I came on For the children. Gotta do it for the children Who came up with that. I that hook because it's really good, but it also is very deceptive. Like whose children is it? are they hurting? and So I think about So many things. I just slow down enough I can get it out of my mouth where it's actually understandable, and Like how we language and how we keep our story alive and important, and where it's. We're not deceiving ourselves or each other when we tell them and Martha Graham used to always say, the body never lies. You know, as somebody who's been in movement for Gosh since I was a tot, but as someone who's been a teacher and facilitator of various forms of movement, i can tell it to be true. Now You can lie about your body or your mind can lie, but the body doesn't. And Learning to be in the body and listen to the body's story and like I've Notice that when I'm around people because of my body used to get very uncomfortable and learning to be comfortable With the story my body would be telling me like oh, of course it's a trauma story and a nervous system story. Like there's, there's so many stories that come From the fact that we're a natural being in a world that we created that may not feel quite as natural. To get back to the whole, we are nature to thing. We'll loop that back in there. I Think it's I'm who had this conversation with about how. Because I used to, one of my running jokes in my class was like touch yourself your nature to, and Because just having people There were people in my one of my classes that had very difficult time with the word sensual, because I would use the word sensual And they stuck it for sexual, much like the whole drag queen idea.
Like drag queens are inherently sexual. I'm like no, they're sparkly and they're, they're, they're, they're Larger than like burlesque is inherently so sexual drag isn't per se. And so I said something about like a Jewish service is inherently sensual and like everybody turn around, like, and I was like it is like you're swaying, there's music, but it's a very like. I had to try to come up with another word because to me the word sensual apparently doesn't mean what it does everybody else, and So I started to learn that you know words mean things, and so I had to like, literally pull out and like Thanks, thanks, phone, you're also dictionary, and that because Hebrew was based on like words that were very sense oriented and they're oh, okay, you didn't mean sex, no, i did not, but I, i, yeah. I find people's Weaponization of sex to be something that will truly American but Truly interesting, and I Think that's a nervous system thing for people to. But let's see where I was coming back home to.
0:15:53 - Briar
Nicole suggested embodied, and I think there's some wisdom there. when our stories Don't Live in our bodies, we're disconnected from them.
0:16:07 - Samantha
Yes, right, right, yes, Yeah. Well, i think I've embodied and said will not necessarily as the same thing, like there there's some nuance between those two. But yeah, but our stories don't live in our bodies like it feels, like most people live like from here, like the I I did. I can say that because I did too. It took a lot of time and like very slow nervous system work together.
Oh wow, I actually have a little toe of my left foot who knew, and it's a dancer thing, because he spent so much time projecting your energy out into the world or into a class or into that that Years of Studied movement go. That is my, that is my chest, yeah, when I breathe there it hurts, oh yeah, because a lot of things. So embodiment is a very different sort of thing than The feel of sensation, which is what, since sensual is. But our art, it's been kind of co-opted By our culture.
0:17:12 - Briar
So yes, Sensual is related to sexual because, as far as we're concerned, both things are bad.
0:17:21 - Samantha
Yeah right. Well, because of what you have to have your senses attached in a way you not necessarily. I've known people, unfortunately, that weren't very sensual with their sexual experience. I won't name names. But learning, like when somebody tells me, no, that's a feeling, that's not a sense, like learning the difference between feeling and senses, like it's you know, for all sense our language is, we're kind of lazy in the way we language those things. I could do hours on, just the language of sensation or feeling. But I put everybody just like. But I think we, because we really started to think about what actually is a sensation in my body right there, what is driving that? Because it's our nervous systems have become so either. I think a lot of people either are very highly out of the body or very in it.
0:18:25 - Briar
So connect us back? How do we get back into our bodies and into our stories?
0:18:38 - Samantha
Into our stories and our body. You know, it's not always easy. Like it's a practice, like everything, like many things, And I think it's different for every person. You know, I'm kind of one of those people that I sit there and I look at the trees like oh trees, And I think being in our body is like a gift that we get to give ourselves every day, Like just the recognition of oh. It's like I'm like feeling, oh, I feel that I, since I, since flight in here, oh, I, I'm feeling grateful or like whatever you're feeling. Like I'm feeling like shit today, Like because it doesn't, because I think so much of meditation is the meditation of oh, I've got to feel grateful, And sometimes you just don't.
And trying to force like meeting yourself, if I pick the way to get like into your body, into everything, meeting yourself right where you are That was probably the key is they have for me is like, oh, I can't do this until I I'm at this weight, or I can't because wait, let's pick. I'm not going to pick that because it's just such a, the Americanized thing. It's like, oh, I'm going to do this until my my hair is whether or it's whatever the thing is, or until my I'm perfectly happy and my children all talk to me again. But it's like, no, no, my life is a shit show, right now Acknowledged. And it's like, oh, because then you're not running from the vibration inside of you. That's discordant, And I think when you can just sit and look at the yep there's a lot of cat hair in my house, or whatever the thing is then there's the not running from the thing And then the thing, you can let the thing come and crawl inside your chest and be there, because it's not other than you, I, for at least for me, that's the starting point. And some days it I can let it. I can let it like I've gotten to where it lives there all the time now. But there was a long time like, okay, I let it in, I'm back back in my head and the universe is everywhere else. And then, letting that be okay, like, oh, yeah, I left, I'm out, I'm like I don't know where I am, My body's still here, But my mind is three days away, or my day. My mind is back mulling over that conversation I had with my father, or my mind is at the grocery store, or my mind is, but it's letting that be okay. And then then going oh, yeah, I left. Okay, sorry, we were fighting and I left because I was afraid. Now I'm back and going. Oh, I can feel my feet, That's it. I feel my feet, Take a breath and look around the room. Yeah, I'm still here.
And it's those little things. I mean they feel ridiculously simple and they are. But simple is not easy. That's the great, the great thing in our lives that we don't realize that simple is not easy And we tend to confuse those two. And easy is not always simple. But simple works, And I think I know for myself. I like to always make things complicated so that I wouldn't do it.
Anybody else has that story, But I like to draw a big compass and then I'm like, oh, why can't you do that? That was my story for a very long time. And then, once I had like supports in play I see that going on in the country too like, well, this, I've got to solve this, I've got to solve this. It's like, why can't we just solve, like I don't know, water? look at some one thing. This is a big thing in San Antonio right now. It's oh, we've got to do this, We've got to do this first, Like, why go back to my little kids? Why And it? why can't we just do it close in start, really close to what's close to you? Who can you help? Whose stories can you capture? Whose stories are you know and I don't want to say whose stories are valuable, because they all are Whose stories support what you're trying to reach out to? Yes, Whose stories support what you're doing? I don't.
My grandmother used to say this. She's like if you're always running to the other side of the ship oh my God, there's sharks over there, Oh my God, there's missiles over there. She's, you're never moving forward. So like whose stories? because everybody's going to have something. It's like find the thing, whatever the thing is, she goes and then find the stories that move forward. So you're not always playing. She lived with me 101. And I was like one day I went to her like Graham, the rubber barons have returned. She was like sweetheart, they never left She. She left in February, February of six, 2016. I think she saw it all coming back And she's like, Nope, not doing this again. I've already seen this shit show. I'm not doing it again. But very wise lady.
0:23:35 - Briar
And I think the the information there is. how do we identify the stories that we need?
0:23:52 - Samantha
Yeah, And I think sometimes you don't know until like versus like getting clear on what you want, like what is the thing we need to move forward, and just getting clear of what you want. I know, for I know for a fact, like I've been married four times. I've been married four times, two more three, and it really wasn't until I was clear on what I wanted. I thought I wanted that thing. No, i didn't. Maybe this, nope, certainly not that. But I didn't know. And I certainly didn't know until I was in it like yep, this sucks, it was what society told me I should have. And until I really really knew who I was and what I wanted and what my actual story was, not the cultural designator, that this is what success is for you. This is how you know you've made it. It's like what do I really think? What in my heart of hearts? And like how do I know? And so, and it's like, oh, okay, so you feel like marriage is easy, and so I.
But I think that's a very privileged take on all that kind of stuff. But I think it's true like figuring out, like I have a very supportive community now. So it's not just me, it's not just us sitting around staring at each other and, oh yeah, you suck. It's like I have a lot of things that I can get from outside of that. I get stories from other people that I lean into and I hear what works for them. It's not just sit around going my story is tied for you forever and till we die We're just going to keep looking at each other over the dinner table till one of the scales over, like that's a horrible story. You're gonna have to support all my needs. Oh, good thing you have insurance. It's the sexiest thing about you. That's another terrible story about America. That's another day. Yeah, i'm not gonna close that rather whole right now.
0:26:01 - Briar
Okay, I'll bring you back. How do we decide which stories we need?
0:26:09 - Samantha
I think we have to know what it is we want to pursue and we like what's important to us. Like we have to know who we are, what's in our heart of hearts like, and it's different for everyone. And then like, if we get together, say you have a community, you're like, okay, what do we need for each other? And then, whose stories support that? Like tell you a story we're in the middle of a cancer search at our temple. And so we're like we have to focus. We have the committee. I've never been on a committee before, so this is fun. It's like we have the committee that's in charge of like getting all the information.
I was like dude, this is a trip. I've never seen this many emails focused at me in my life. And so they're like all right, and I'll do this thing, i'll do this. And they're like what are you gonna do? I'm gonna be the cruise director and leave the meeting where the people talk, because I can't do that much paperwork. My computer would explode. But I can definitely lead a group of people around the room to time, because that's basically choreography. So I can do that. And they're like seriously, that's my job. I'm good at moving people's bodies around the room to a certain amount of time. That's what I'm gonna do And they're like okay, are you gonna like write this down? I was like just tell me how much time I have for each table and we're good, i will have somebody else format that email for you if you need it. But like that, and you know, like certain people's story needs paperwork. Certain people just need a loose napkin. I was like Southwest Maryland was found in my cocktail nap. Certainly I could pull this off.
0:27:46 - Briar
So there's structure here. The story that is coming to mind here is the difference between panzers and plotters. Are you familiar with this? I am not. I definitely will.
0:28:01 - Samantha
I now wanna know. I'm now intrigued.
0:28:04 - Briar
When, in the writing community, people who are plotters outline their books. So there's bullet points, there's outlines, and then there's panzers. And you, my friend, are a pancer. You run everything by the seat of your pants.
0:28:25 - Samantha
Oh, absolutely.
0:28:28 - Briar
I think that both truly both approaches have merit, but especially when we look at fiction, the results are completely different. I can always tell especially now, after many decades of reading fiction. I can tell who's a pancer and who's a plotter, because plotters happen, those novels happen, and even if there's twists and turns, they do what's expected of the story. Harry Potter was a plotter, jake K Rowling is a plotter There are screenshots of her napkins, right Right Whereas Stephen King is a pancer Oh, pancer, absolutely. Those stories meander around, they go all sorts of places, and I think there is real value in figuring out your personal approach to story.
0:29:34 - Samantha
Yeah, that's such a really good. It's so funny. I read his book about going back in time to stop the JFK assassination And it just meander. But it is a love letter, it is a love affair with the American culture of that time. I mean, it's just I would cry if his writing is so beautiful. And then Harry Potter, of course, like Tom Clancy, totally a plotter.
0:30:05 - Briar
There's no way, absolutely a plotter.
0:30:07 - Samantha
No way you can write all of that out And remember all of those characters and all of that sort of stuff without Without clear outlines, absolutely. I was like, oh my gosh, but King is just like a. Yes, i can remember it all in my brain. I want to know his natal chart now. Let's look that up on this.
0:30:28 - Briar
He talks about in his book On Writing.
0:30:31 - Samantha
On.
0:30:31 - Briar
Writing that writing for him is like an archeological dig. He has an idea And then it's just about unearthing the rest, And I think that so much of story for people is about unearthing what's there. How do we do that?
0:30:56 - Samantha
How do we do that?
That's good. It's like Michelangelo, like he saw what every. He tuned out everything that wasn't the, wasn't the sculpture, and I think it's like I said you see, have I? it's a strong idea in your mind and sometimes like, oh, that's there. Like when I used to paint a lot, i did something with all the energy of my divorce. So I was like A jack jack the dripper on steroids. But instead of dripping it around, i feel violently through the floor. And I found it When I, when I was patient and kind of played with it more versus alright, screw you, i could see what was coming.
I let the paint talk. It's like letting the story talk, letting the characters. You know. If it's based on a true story, like I was earlier today, i don't consume. One immediate today Is H H Holmes, the you know the devil in the white castle in Chicago. They were talking. They were talking about how Sierra LeCuelling, i guess, is similar to storytelling, how his stuff all unfolded, and I think Telling a story is like that. You see what's there and it was like, okay, no, or the guy. It was actually the story about the guy who caught him, like he was an in, who was a detective for an insurance Because he had insurance fraud, that you get the country every time, how he would go back and like it was letters I think letters from kids that then he would go through every single town.
I think there are clues when they're telling a story. If there's a natural like, hmm, okay, what would happen next? and if it's based on real life, okay, it's kind of like ancestry Oh, i've got a leaf. Oh, okay, is this person actually my grandmother's brother? or is this just they found this name on a, on a death certificate and they hooked it together because they're lazy. That happens a lot. And in real life, okay, is this really what I want? Is this really the voice of That particular person? and I think you can know, i mean, i can always feel like no, they definitely would say that, or sure they would. But it comes because, you know, come like the body didn't, like I'm writing. That's why I write all my stuff long-hand. I'm writing. I don't know my hand will literally just stop.
No, and I think once we're in a place where we feel this is actually me And this is something I want to say. This is a story, this is a part of the legacy I want to leave behind. I'm getting this point in my life where I'm like, yeah, okay, i survived a lot of shit. I have a lot of wisdom I want to share. Now, how do I want to share it? What is the voice of the legacy I want to leave behind me? What is it the voice?
It's the nice sign of like having kids out of the house and like, wow, like they're actually out of the nest and come back, and So, you know, parents safely moved out of my childhood homes. They are actually like moving, like a grown-up now, and, and I like how, what are the things that I did that helped that all happen? and What are the? what are the voices of, like the younger versions of me? That's like I would go back and say, hey, you know, keep going. This this actually why you're miserable. It gets better. Like, yeah, right now You're like you're in a world of suck, but it gets better, and For people out there, they're in that place like, yeah, it could, the world does get better. Sometimes it's hard to say, though, and I look at things going on in the world right now in the US, but I think there's a generation coming that will not sit idly by Because when they start, because they're voting now and once, once, this generation that's in power ages out, because, you know, 89 year olds can't stay in power forever.
0:34:58 - Briar
Um despite their insistence on trying.
0:35:02 - Samantha
I was like eventually time will out, um, and so I was like, eventually young people will come into power and um, things will change. And I think part of what we're seeing now is That a desperate grab to hang on to power that is illegitimate. I mean because Texas they just since this just came out white people are the minority in Texas now, and definitely not the minority in power, but they're minority in census And that's what you pick up a bunch of old white guys, you know, passing ridiculous laws. That you know the next time we have a legitimate, if we ever have a legitimate election in Texas in the future, um, they're gonna be gone And like This is a good question, though.
0:35:57 - Briar
What's the difference between story and history?
0:36:06 - Samantha
Well, history does have story at the end. That's correct. And I think, as we find like is interesting, you put up like archaeological dig from Stephen King, i think, as archaeology comes out, or they're having to do a lot of like, re Retelling and rethinking of history. Like, oh well, there's no way that story could have actually been real Because it doesn't match up with any of the stuff that they're finding in places like, oh, we've all been sold bill of goods, a lot of things, and so, um, you know the winner is like. You know The winner is like. So you know the oldest story in the book. The winner tells the narrative and who knows? And generations down the road buy it.
Like we're stuck in that right now that we can't tell the fact that America was founded by a bunch of Genocidal white guys who didn't want to pay taxes. Who the hell is in power right now? Well, they're too old to be genocidal, but they still. But, but it shows I would like to think that the founders maybe, maybe thought that we would have not Worshiped them and would have given, like, more changes through the years, but I guess they gave us too much credit. But that's my, that's my story, um, and because I'm like I was a kid in school, like we Worship the founders, like because you know, i started school in like 76, so literally it was the 200th anniversary.
I was in first grade that year. It was kind of like, And so I think perhaps it was like, from that point on it was just something we did and I didn't think about that till that moment. Then, oh my gosh, america. Then it was like the 200th anniversary of the constitution and then like the whatever anniversary of the statue of liberty, and so it's like there was all this opportunity for America worship, which I think is leading to like to all the white nationalism which I guess never really went away but Was a rebound to the civil rights movement because they weren't that far apart from each other um, and Literally it was like the bedrock to what we're seeing now, and um, but it's funny because I was a kid, so it was just coming off. I guess this is how it is. I was one of those little kids that would kind of sit around and just watch growing up, like hmm.
0:38:33 - Briar
Right, because, as we say around here, often you don't know what you don't know, and you don't know to ask that question When you're being indoctrinated, right?
0:38:42 - Samantha
Right like we had. We would sing like battlehams in church. When I was a child and I'm like I thought Jesus was a pacifist. I mean like you, don't wait a minute. Why does the lord need an army? you know.
0:39:00 - Briar
So I definitely want to spend some time in this series unpacking Why, or the ways in which we tell each other bad stories and the ways Bad stories seem to be so much more Viral than the good ones. There are Bad news and and this is this is well documented. Didn't study this point in time.
We're much more inclined to hear pay attention to, and then Disseminate bad news. Then we are to hear pay attention to or disseminate good news. Multiple media organizations have been like how come there's no good news? We need good news. Don't bring out good news and nobody pays attention, nobody watches, nobody shares. So what is this about theory on that? Sorry, and and I, and that's what I want to hear What is this about Bad news that is so much more replicable, unreasonable than good news?
0:40:16 - Samantha
I think it's an ancient, ancient part of us that we share the bad news, because that's how we say to lie Like good news. Oh, that's great, good for you, bob. But then then bob just got eaten, got this, bob just got clobbered by a, you know, by a mammoth. It's like, oh no, shit, sorry, bob, let's get out of here. And I just think like over time that became part of our wiring And, let's face it, it's like shit. The nervous system hit is so much more great And it was our way to. It's a little tiny high And we still get it. I mean, it's dopamine is not so much feel good as it is anticipation And what else? what do we anticipate anymore? Oh, i want this, i want that, but bad news is anticipatory. So that's oh shit, it's coming And nothing really happened. I mean, like what? But it's like, oh my god, the end of the world. Oh my god, this, oh my gosh, that doom doom doom.
And it's something you can anticipate, And so that's that's my theory.
0:41:29 - Briar
But that didn't that, and I like it. This, this has merit. That then filters into our everyday circumstance and reality. If I'm always anticipating doom, then I'm going to prepare for it.
0:41:47 - Samantha
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think about like the start of the pandemic when everybody was like, oh my god, toilet paper, right. And then it became like a self-fulfilling thing because the toilet paper places couldn't keep up. Oh my god, i can't get any more toilet paper. Oh, i mean it's such a great one. Because it's like humans are just we're a ridiculous species. We really are. We've got these little mammal bodies and we can drive around in these metal living rooms And it's like why don't we need cars? I mean cars are ridiculous, they're ridiculous.
Like I think about how, for most of the things that I do, if you have kids yes, okay, many vans make total sense with children, because raising children is kind of a ridiculous, ridiculous thing to do in a way that Americans do it. I mean Americans are the most like non-community oriented. But I was like if we had like any sort of like oh, yes, let's bring in our elders, yes, let's bring in, let's build this. But no, we build our entire communities around cars, like everything is built around parking, fuck. So I was like I would love to have like a little tuk-tuk where I could like it could be solar, run, put a little battery in the bag for all this stuff And then have like public community, like public community transportation that's the word for like big stuff, and I had to drive around.
We could have like trains if we had decent trains I wouldn't need a car, like a little golf cart And it would rather than like electric cars, because electric cars are. We wouldn't have enough cobalt on the planet for a second generation of electric cars. So, like, science on this is already stalled out. So it's like all right back to the drawing board, new ideas, guys, because the old ones.
0:43:27 - Briar
cars are a part of our story, though, And very uniquely the American story. We, Henry Ford, the 40 hour work week, all of those things are deeply embedded into our story And we are therefore very reluctant to change that story.
0:43:54 - Samantha
That is an excellent point. Yeah, i think about that, because the whole reason we have the schools, the educational system we have, is because of the 40 hour work week and the industrial system. But that is all gone pretty much from America. Now. I forgot how many people for later I think 1,000 people on Monday here in America And so I was like that is slowly leaving.
And so how do we transform the way we do everything, which is exciting? I was like change is scary, yes, but it's also exciting. There's the thing to anticipate. That's not due. It's like how do we look outside? All right, this is coming. So we go there And we look at it with like because we have people that we know are safe and we have people we know that we've vetted And we know that doesn't happen overnight.
But there's a way to start with stories, because it's data that we learn. Oh, i hear your story, i hear your story and my story. It's kind of like when cats smell each other's butts. Stories is that for people? I think of it that way. It's like, oh, that's kind of why 12 steps work. When they do, people get together and they share stories And I think for the times it works. It's like that sort of support groups will throw it off of that way. It's because, like, oh, i see you in me, i see how, or I'm so desperate, i don't see anything in me but help. And I'm like, ok, i'm here to help, there's no judgment here, there's no that. And it gets to a place where that, to me, is what's missing in the American story. Is there so much bravado and so much. I have freedom to be selfish, not to be community oriented. I don't have any obligation to the society. That's. What's missing in the American story is a lack of obligation to each other.
0:45:56 - Briar
And I think that's where I want to wrap the series And this episode of How Do We Change the Story.
0:46:10 - Samantha
I think the next generation is like they're more union oriented. They're definitely like more collective, oriented toward each other, like they care. My kids are one that's like a zinniol No, she's a yeah, i can't keep up anywhere. And I have two that are solidly Gen Z And they care about their friends so much Like they will miss meals so they can go support their friends And it's like, wow, that's thanks for that example. I need to do more for people. Let me just call my friends and make sure they're all. Ok, i'm with the agent. I need to call my friends and make sure they're all alive.
So I think, looking to and one of the things I was telling a friend of mine last week, i said I was the really beautiful place where raising my children, where it was very co-creative Because I knew the way I'd been raised wasn't going to work, like the blueprint that my grandparents had handed my parents was not going to work on that generation. And so I was like, ok, you teach me how to use this, i'll teach you how to drive a car. Ok, perfect, you teach me how to do this, i'll teach you how to use cutlery. That's a little backwards, but same point. And so we had this beautiful co-creative model And I saw friends of mine that were trying to use the old authoritarian model that the church and then everyone else had handed down Not me to show them the church that much There are some beautiful churches, but it's still trying to use the old model on kids that weren't going to fall in it.
And so I think really looking to the future is looking to the young people, because they've got some great ideas And they're ready to get together and like, hey, let's move economy And hey, let's do this. Hey, i'll do this for you. They're bartering, they're doing the things, and I think there's a way to, as opposed to just going ugh. And there are some that are just like we're never going to have a this or a that And there's also hopelessness in that generation too, i also see. But I think there's some really crafty ones that are doing some good stuff And I think there's a. I wish I had some I could just pull up top of my head, but I don't, but next time I will.
0:48:17 - Briar
I'll find some. I'll have some homework. Trust me, i've written all of these things down. We're going to have so many places to go this season.
And I'm really I'm excited to explore the ways in which we benefit from story, Because it's easy to see the ways in which story can be harmful, the ways that we perpetuate negative stories, the ways that we continue to tell each other bad stories, and, whether we like it or not, religion is one of those stories. It's been handed down on literal stone tablet for millennia now, and questioning authority or the story has not gone over well, historically speaking. So I think that there's really room to grow into. Well, how do we do it instead?
0:49:26 - Samantha
Yeah, it's like yes, like nodging, yes, that happened And let's do something different. Like I'm working on that, like improv piece of yes, and I'm going to go over here now and do this, like just letting it burn itself out, rather than trying to challenge it. Like, yes, you're here, there are things that definitely need to be challenged, but rather than just going into the door, mm-hmm, y'all can go over there and just burn yourself out And I'm going to go over here and do something different. And yeah, and I found like, at least for me, that was kind of because you're like what did you tell your parents about this and the other? I'm going.
You know what? they're in their 80s. I try to just be as supportive as I can about the things they believe, and let them do that, because they're in their 80s And throwing sticks and stones in their belief system isn't really productive, and anyone's belief system is, i found is not the best way to go about doing that. Trying to find ways where you can come together and go yes, i believe that too. Yes, and what else do we do we have in common? I find that to be way better a way to get a story that is co-creative together.
0:50:37 - Briar
Truly, one of the most valuable lessons I have ever learned is yes, and. And for those of you who don't know it, it's an improv rule that when you are going into a scenario with someone and you don't know what it's going to be, instead of saying no, you say yes. And there are so many more places to go. No closes down the discussion, it closes down our willingness to participate, but yes, yes is possibility And yes, let's the person be seen.
0:51:22 - Samantha
Like, yes, i see you And what do you need? Or yes, and let's take care of this. Or yes, and I have a need also, like there's a place where it opens up so much. Now it opens up this place for something that wasn't there before And we're just also improv.
0:51:51 - Briar
And I think that's what we're trying to do here We're trying to help you find the ways that you get to say yes and to your story, to everyone else's story, without being in conflict internally with yourself. Final thoughts, my friend, final thoughts, thank you. Thank you so much for this opportunity.
0:52:14 - Samantha
This has been a true adventure And I really do like just having discovered about myself that I'm a panther panther because I've always known that, And so, yeah, I'm leading forward to what I learned about myself, But I get to teach and work on my own. I get to teach myself, but I get to teach and more things I get to discover. So thanks a lot for allowing me to be here today.
0:52:43 - Briar
I'm so excited. This is going to be so much fun And I deeply encourage everyone who's watched today to stick around. We will be back this time every other week. We're really looking forward to growing and leading into collaborative storytelling. So if you have questions, comments, concerns, please do leave them in the comments. Wherever it was that you watched this, get in touch with me. You can find this at the neurodiversitymedianetwork.com. We would love to hear how we can collaborate and tell our stories together. Thank you all so much for being here today. Samantha, you are a gem. This is so fun And we will be back next time for another adventure in how to tell your story. All right, y'all. Thanks so much.
Transcribed by https://podium.page
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